Self-Love: My Way
Setting goals and meeting them makes me feel like a Boss. Think of a time you set a goal to work out 4 days a week, and at the end of the week you saw your charts and you actually stuck to the plan. How did that make you feel? Or the time you set a goal to get a certification to advance your career and you read every day until you eventually passed. Even before you passed, that daily victory of putting in the work gets you cranked up. Eating healthy; meeting milestones at work, etc make you feel good, doesn’t it?
Now conversely, think of a time when you binge ate and you didn’t do your workout and you were supposed to be on a weightloss plan. You felt like crap, didn’t you? I would too but of course, you can always pick yourself back up. Or you set a goal to spend more time with your kids but you couldn’t and you felt that temporary feeling of ‘ I have messed this up’.
Thinking about it, meeting your goals could be considered setting boundaries of some sort. Just this time, it is setting boundaries with yourself and sticking to what is important.
Focusing always on the things you can control rather than the things you have absolutely no control over. It is within your control to stay healthy. It is not within your control to have your boss treat you nicely, so train your mind to not let that be the thing that determines your happiness. Alternatively, it is within your control to take certification courses, apply and qualify for a new job.
So I say to you, set boundaries for others but most especially for yourself. Do what you say you would do. Work on self-improvement. List all the positive habits that you’d like to incorporate into your life, then add in just one new habit a week. Tick off each habit as you incorporate it into your schedule. Evaluate goals set them and meet them. It is the best feeling in the world. I have been loving myself lately. I go to the gym 3 times a week and I eat 2 healthy meals daily one of which is a green leaf salad. I am also taking certifications to advance my career. I am more polite, kinder, and compassionate. I am really loving myself. I even took photography classes and bought the full Canon gear and I have been improving my creativity. Who knows, it may very well become a side hustle that brings me money. This is the best way I know how to love myself.
In a nutshell, if you want to practice self-love, maybe it helps to give yourself something to love. Meditate, practice self-awareness, know yourself, and learn what self-love means to you.
Come up with a plan, a checklist on how to excel in all areas of your life -relationships, career, emotional intelligence, your appearance, etc and kick ass throughout the day checking off stuff from your list.
I know there are talks of loving yourself unconditionally and that is great though it takes a lot more mental work. I am hoping to discuss that more in another write-up. My tips here give you something to starting working on immediately to get you to start feeling great about yourself today.
Check this out:
I loved myself so much today when I helped my mum run some errands.
I loved myself so much today when I told my best friend how much I appreciated our friendship and offered a little gift.
I loved myself immensely today when a colleague upset me during a meeting and I was able to diffuse the situation and get my point across without escalating the situation.
You love yourself when you become the person you want to be. All of these things make me fall in love with the person I am becoming and it has become so much easier to love others. I am sure you will agree with me, you won’t love yourself much if you are always in a fight with somebody; you are never looking good or if you constantly procrastinate important things that could get you to your desired place in life.
Self-love is never about loving yourself and treating others any less. A whole new level of self-love is going out there and loving and giving and serving and seeing how good you feel about yourself.
How did I miss that?
